Flow in Therapy
Therapy Sessions Should Activate Flow
Psychological flow shows up in a lot of different activities. And, one of those should be in your therapy sessions.
Here we go!
Flow in Therapy
I would argue that one of the most important things in a therapy session is for you and your therapist to be able to drop into flow together. Also known as Group Flow. Psychological flow is a state of consciousness where we think and feel and perform at our best. It is also a time when we receive a massive boost in creative thinking and problem solving and pattern recognition. Those 3 things are very important in the counseling process, and flow only amplifies them.
Another cool thing about flow is that it helps us endure through difficulty. It makes us more resilient. Flow allows us to think more flexibly because it turns off the “over analytical self critic” in our prefrontal cortex. And, it allows us to more efficiently tap into our curiosity. Increased curiosity means better responses to fear and anxiety.
Another great thing about flow is that it requires a small level of the feeling of risk. The exact right amount of risk taking that we hope to activate in the counseling process. This takes the form of exposure assignments, emotional openness, vulnerability, willingness to approach difficult or unwanted thoughts and emotions and sensations, trying out new behaviors inside and outside of session. “Challenging but manageable” and gradual is what we are shooting for.
That challenging but manageable range allows us to stay within the proper skill to college ratio. In other words: Balancing boredom and anxiety levels. Too low of a challenge and it is easy to become bored and inactivated. Too high a challenge and anxiety may begin to interfere.
Social Flow Triggers
Group genius author, Keith Sawyer, found that deep conversation is one of the most common places flow is activated. You may have had that experience before! You get to talking to someone about some interesting, important stuff and suddenly you look at your clock and time has flown by.
So, how do you get more flow in a therapy session? Well, try to activate as many of these flow triggers as possible.
Complete Concentration
Shared, Clear Goals
Shared Risk
Close Listening
Good Communication
Equal Participation
Blending of Egos
Familiarity
Autonomy
Always Say “Yes”
Complete Concentration
This can be kick started by beginning each session with a brief mindfulness exercise. Centering the attention on the session. Practicing the observing of thoughts and feelings as they come and go. Defusing from any unhelpful thoughts that may interfere with the session.
Complete concentration will ensure that the therapist and client are totally engaged. Afterall, flow follows focus. And, that focus should be on the here and now. What’s actually going on in the session.
Shared, Clear Goals
Sessions should also have a flexible, shared, clear goal. Both the therapist and the client set the goal. The therapist should defer to the client's needs, but be careful not to lose autonomy. Both people have the right to direct the session. Process through any disagreements on goals!
Clear goals give us a frame in which we can be more creative and flexible. Once our shared goals are clarified then we can really make some headway. There are smaller goals for each session and larger goals that give direction to the therapy process as a whole.
Shared Risk Taking
The client and therapist must work towards openly sharing emotions and thoughts. Practicing appropriate vulnerability. Emotional openness. In the beginning of therapy, at times the therapist must model what this looks like. Therapists will also not disclose anything that would be unhelpful for the therapeutic alliance. Therapist and client will both take emotional and behavioral risks in session.
Processing through these appropriate risks will allow for client progress. Practicing new behaviors and responses in session. The therapist will look to evoke clinically relevant behaviors in the client, and evoke and reinforce client desired new behaviors. Small, appropriate risks spark flow!
Close Listening and Good Communication
These follow after complete concentration. Both therapist and client listen closely to each other. Both view the other person’s words as important and valuable. Both the therapist and the client communicate to the point of understanding. If there is a lack of understanding, more discussion will take place until there is clear understanding. Both are not afraid to ask for clarification or interpretation.
This can help the client and therapist create a “common” language to enhance conversation in session. Thus, deepening the conversation and increasing the likelihood of dropping into group flow.
Equal Participation
Both therapist and client are equally participating in the session. Neither one dominates the session. Both give equal effort into the therapy process and the change process.
Blending egos
With this, client and therapist feeling they are on even ground. The feeling of true equality. Yes, the therapist has a specific level of expertise on some things, but the therapist is not the expert on the client’s experience. Therefore, egos need to be blended. Again, neither one dominates the session. Rather, there is equal space available for both people to share thoughts and feelings.
Familiarity
The client and writer are comfortable enough with each other in session. That means the therapist and client have built up enough rapport and continue to strengthen the therapeutic relationship. Both people share an understanding of each other.
Autonomy
Both the therapist and client feel a sense of control in the counseling process, and remain flexible because of blended egos and close listening. Metaphorically, the client is in the driver’s seat, and the therapist in the passenger seat. The therapist has, however, somewhat of a road map of where the trip might go and experience being a co-pilot.
Always say “yes”
This means listening closely to what the other person is saying, accepting it, and building on it/ extending it. It is based on the first rule of improv comedy, “Yes, and…”. Taking this approach fosters innovation and creativity. Two things that are surely necessary in the counseling process. Plus, this also adds to the feeling of equality in the therapeutic alliance. Two people working together for the same purpose.
You might feel like you are stuck or not making meaningful progress on your counseling journey if too many of these social flow triggers are missing. Therapists can intentionally open up conversation about the counseling relationship if these are missing, and clients have the autonomy to bring it up as well. Drop into flow more often in therapy and see your progress begin to accelerate.
Better Counseling. Better Results. Better Life.
Live Better.
Drew
